Movie Experience

Took Adam to see Cars 2. About an hour in he has to go to the bathroom. On the way, I asked him “pee or poop?” He says pee. I get him in front of the urinal, pants around his ankles. He starts going and very quickly thereafter says “oh no, poop”
In his crocs, on his shorts, on his unders, and of course on the floor. I picked him up, turned him around and let him squeeze the rest in to the urinal and of course he's peeing all over the floor as he's pooping.
Get him into a stall, told him to stand there while I washed out his clothes, of course he didn’t and there are people in and out of the bathroom. He comes out again and “poop, poop”
Left the clothes on the sink, grab his pits, plop him down and he goes again. A kid goes to the sink and “eeew, gross” Adam at this point isn’t crying, but close to. I get his shorts washed out but I threw his unders away -- which was a mistake because those were his favorite I am told.
Dig out the unders, tell Adam his shorts are going to have to be just like a swimsuit and that it is ok. Half hoping he’d want to leave, I asked him what he wanted to do and he wanted to watch the rest of the movie so I wrapped up the unders in a towel and back in we went.
Sat back down only to realize I had sh1t all over the back of my hand.

I love being a dad.